is overrated. Seriously. The city is full of nightclubs, bars, pubs, and other such places deceivingly conducive towards meeting new, interesting people. But somehow, for most of us, it doesn't really work out like that. I don't see any sort of future with a guy I meet at a bar. But here's the best part. That doesn't stop me from getting all dressed up and heading out to check out different nightclubs every two weeks.
I have no idea what I am trying to achieve. Maybe its just for the attention. Who doesn't like being told they're gorgeous by three different people on the same night? It's great for the self esteem, but at the same time it makes you feel kinda pathetic that blatant flattery can be so effective in cheering you up. Makes you question just how crappy your self image is.
And why not? I personally believe that NYC has a gazillion smart women, but I fail to see the same level of attractiveness in the guys here. Maybe its just me, but I had rather deluded expectations of meeting interesting, fun and let's be honest, economically stable guys here. Clearly I had a misguided impression of the NYC single life.
And tonight was the worst. I don't understand my friends sometimes. We went to three different clubs until they finally decided there was enough dancing, and according to me the music was the most atrocious at the last place. The way I see it everyone wanted to go to the last place all along.
Its so sad. There are two different rooms at that club, one which plays contemporary hip hop, and the other larger one that plays eighties happy-happy songs (such as "Cecilia", "I love rock and roll" and other such incredibly un-dance-able hits). I kept trying to drag people to the hip hop room, where the music was catchy, had some sort of beat, and people were dancing normally. But my gal pals wanted to hang out in the other room, where all the older, suited blokes were. The oldies room was packed, with a zillion drinks on the floor, to the point where i was reminded of Bombay's local trains. It was unbearable. If people (i.e. normal sized guys and women) push up against me, i just fall..i don't seem to have any sort of strength. I don't like dancing that involves getting punched every three minutes, and stamped every thirty seconds. And it sucks all the fun out of the experience.
Tonight everything seemed to get on my nerves.
There was an old (paternal, even) creepy guy we recognized from the last time we were there. He kept hovering around us, and everyone was cribbing about him, but nobody did anything to drive him away. Finally i got annoyed (more with my friends than him) and went up to him.
"Look, can you just leave us alone? None of us is interested. "
And he just walked away, not before calling me a bitch.
The tragedy of the night was that I turned away the cutest guy- he asked me to dance with him. I regretted it deeply, the minute he walked away, cause he was really good looking and a great dancer.
He slid up to me and asked if I would dance with him. Idiot that I am, I said, sorry, I don't dance with other people. He responded with "I'm a nice guy", to which I said that I was sure he was, but I just didn't dance with other people- I'd probably stamp him.
He said it's ok, I respect that. And walked away. Without haunting me, giving me stupid grins, and abusing me. waah, why do i have to be sensible about these things!
And then later, he was dancing with another friend of mine. aaaaaa
Anyway. Must rethink strategy here.
Another shocker was that some guy actually noticed my friend's earrings- she was wearing American football jersey earrings (Patriots), because there was a match involving the Patriots today that we saw at the bar.
I didn't realise that there are still guys out there who will notice earrings.
A low point of the evening was that some old dude bought drinks for the four of us. I was disgusted that I accepted the free drink. But I was quite a bitch about it- he tried sidling up to us after that, and two of my friends danced with him, the poor souls. I just gave him a look of disgust and walked away.
I think the right thing to do is just not accept drinks at all- the next time I should tell myself that!
Thursday, January 10, 2008
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16 comments:
this entry makes you sound pathetic.
K2,
The moment you stop looking around/searching for life, life will come knocking on your door.
:)
Great, honest post, Kate. The nightclub scene's always complicated (well, in my mind at any rate). Which is all the more reason to keep it separate from the dating scene (also complicated). A little tweaking of strategy might be called for... but otherwise, you seem to be doing alright for yourself...
I wish blogger used nomenclature like Slashdot and people who posted anonymous were labelled as "Anonymous Cowards."
Anyway, pathetic you're not and you know it. Although you should be kicking yourself about the nice guy. Creepy old men should be just kicked.
:)
*jumps up and kicks ashwan*
teehee... sorry, couldn't resist!
With age comes wisdom.
You too shall learn, little grasshopper.
Hey Kate..dun wrry..there are more hunks waiting for u out there...And this is the advise that a German friend of mine gave me..At times its nice to just shut ur head and do what u enjoy..So..the next time a hunk comes up to u...u knw wht to do :D
We are in the same boat..I hve done the same things as you have too..So..i knw how it feels :)..But chill baby...this is just the start..u are gonna hve loads of fun :)
It might be good to have a print of this article for creepy guys..
http://www.sirc.org/publik/flirt.html
Hope it helps.
I donno about flirting on the blogs though ;)
Anonymous: The truth is never pleasant. Strangely though, I feel a lot less pathetic after venting on my blog.
shazia: I did not look for 24 years. Nothing happened. Now I just want to meet normal people to hang out with. Emphasis on the word normal. I'm not looking for my soulmate in a bar, don't worry. :)
dylan and ashwan: get a room already.
beanz: I'm not worried, just confused.
anon 2 : Its kinda hard to flirt with 'anonymous', don't you think?
I once had to drop a turkish visitor to his hotel and I was very embarassed that the Bombay cabbies didnt want to go. The visitor, who had a blast in the city I think, Noticed my embarasment and said " dont worry I've been to every continent, people everywhere are the same"
If I advised you to engage with the new culture with no expectations and mild detachment.
would you accept my advice?
And Im anonymous because not because I'm a coward but because I'm not as comfortable as the rest of you talking about my personal life as if it were a trophy to show off in the public domain. all you brave bloggers can bitch all you want.
Hehe...come on it's not all that bad. You look gorgeous in the pics on your last post :-). And it takes great courage to be honest. So hurrah to you. But it looks like the NY cold is getting to you :-)
Trust me, the dating game is way loaded against guys. Guess how many of pretty lasses like you shoot down all those "older", "not so cute", "paternalistic" guys? Guess what all that poor old chap has to go through to get a date? Thats life - Men pick, women choose! And for some reason, there are way more dudes than chicks in the West coast!
have fun in school! and keep blogging!
A aka arunz :-)
Clonazepam....*snicker*
anon: Sensible advice. Though I disagree on the trophy bit.
Arunz: Thanks. It really isn't all that bad. I'm just a dramaqueen..
Nash: Thanks ya. How very sympathetic yet rational of you. :-)
I second Beannz's 'do now - think later' strategy.
I think we think too much. its hazardous to society's well-being.
Here's to the movement to save the world from such tragedies...Just dive right in...:D
-Wonderwoman.
Aha, Big City Blues :)
If you were to get the time read Joseph Mitchell. He wrote about the NY Waterfront, and wrote beautifully too.
The Fulton Fish Market he wrote of is no longer how it was during his time, but you might want to explore it sometime. It is not far from where the WTC once stood.
SHIUT TEH FUCK UPO DUMB BICTH
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